Assumptions really do make as ASS out of U and ME (!)

 

 

Well, as so often is the case, it’s not really us doing it. It’s the Little Monster in our Heads who loves making assumptions, which are really just judgements in disguise. 

 

And, as we all know, assumptions are the quickest way to weigh up a person or situation. 

 

Even better, they’re simple and automatic. No thinking is involved, just a simple knee jerk reaction. 

 

And, last – but definitely not least – they create certainty. We know beforehand exactly how we’re likely to view – and then react to – any person or situation. And if there’s one thing the Little Monster in our Heads craves, it’s certainty. 

 

Unfortunately, as the very clever play on words demonstrates, there’s a very big downside to this approach. It means we don’t stop to think – and weigh up – the person or situation, but do exactly the same thing over and over again. With all too predictable results… 

 

Here’s a great little story that perfectly illustrates just how easily assumptions can send us down completely the wrong path. Ready? Here goes: 

 

A Psychiatrist, Engineer and Doctor got lost in the woods one dark winter’s night. Stumbling on a log cabin, they knocked on the door and, getting no answer, went inside for shelter. 

 

In the corner was a waist high platform, with a wood burning stove on top. As they warmed up their frozen fingers, the stove quickly became the centre of conversation. 

 

The Psychiatrist said that the stove’s unusual position was evidence of psychological problems brought on by living in isolation in the woods. 

 

The Engineer, on the other hand, thought it was an ingenious form of forced air heating. 

 

While the Doctor diagnosed Arthritis, as there was no need to bend over to put wood on the stove. 

 

When the owner finally arrived, they couldn’t resist asking about the stove’s design. “Simple” he said “the stove pipe was too short, so I had to put it on a platform!!!” 

 

Assumptions really do make an ASS out of U and ME. 

 

So, what’s the answer? 

 

Well, as usual, there are some very simple solutions. Here are a couple to get you going: 

 

The first is very obvious and, yet, something we forget to do. Or, are too embarrassed to do (!). If something is unclear, simply ask. “I’m not sure about this / can you explain this to me / this is how I’m seeing it, how about you / fill in the blank(s)???” 

 

The second less so and, for this reason, can be seen as a rather radical approach by some people. Certainly the Little Monster in your Head. 

 

Ready? 

 

Not to make an assumption – or judgement (!) – about anything in the first place. Instead, simply observe everything from a “that’s interesting” point of view. 

 

Or, put another way, you can just sit on the fence and let things unfold, see where they take you. If you need a quick reminder about the golden opportunity offered by sitting on the fence, click here. 

 

Not only does it stop you from being drawn into things that are really nothing to do with you (!), but you’ll find life becomes much easier. Flows more easily. Not to mention becoming much more interesting. Even better, you’ll learn lots of things about the people and events in your life, not to mention yourself… 

 

Oh and for those who think they’re open minded and don’t make assumptions about anything (!) here’s a little challenge. Go through a whole day by noticing how you react to whatever happens in your life. And how much of that is based on knee jerk assumptions or judgements. You’ll probably be quite surprised by what you learn about yourself… 

 

Yes, assumptions really do make and ASS out of U and ME. 

 

As always, the choice is yours.