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Posts tagged “Mindset”

And, yes, before we go any further we know this simple question is going to touch a raw spot with some people. But, as usual, we’re not trying to send anyone’s blood pressure through the roof or be provocative. Merely give you a different perspective on something we all take for granted. We’ve mentioned it in passing on a number of occasions and, with the increasingly hysterical nature of mainstream reporting, thought it was time to make it the topic of the week. So, if you need to, take a deep calming breath – or two (!) – before reading on. 
Welcome to the first post of 2021, a shiny new year beckons. Hurrah! So, it must be time for our – almost traditional (!) – different perspective to start the New Year. Well, more accurately, on how to avoid starting it with a series of over optimistic / completely unrealistic / alcohol fuelled (!) resolutions. Which are equally quickly followed by them being broken or not having the desired results. Not forgetting all the guilt and other negative emotions that entails. Deep calming breaths all round… 
 
Instead, let’s focus on three simple things, the importance of which we were reminded about during the rollercoaster that was 2020. They require no financial investment. No complicated or expensive equipment. Only as much time as you want to give them. Despite this, they can all be seen as investments, in the broadest sense of the word. 
Well, it’s THAT time of the year again. One that’s guaranteed to send stress levels rocketing through the roof. And that’s without the current madness, which is all we’re going to say on that particular topic (!). 
 
So, it seemed like a good time for a little reminder of a saying that’s become our mantra for the year. Looking back, it featured in a 2019 post, although it’s really come into its own during 2020. You may even have found yourself saying – or thinking – it about yourself or those around you. 
 
Everyone is doing the best they know how. Yes, everyone is really doing the best they know how. 
We often talk about the modern obsession with communication and its unintended – and unanticipated – consequences. Peer pressure. Knee jerk reactions, often on the flimsiest of information. Opinions and hearsay dressed up as facts. The increasing polarisation of different points of view, leading to a belligerent “I’m right, everyone else is wrong.” And much more besides. 
 
With pressure coming in from every side, it’s little wonder that simply saying “I don’t know” has become such a difficult thing to say. And it doesn’t seem to matter whether it’s on the smallest – and least important – matter or something much larger or more complicated. 
 
Why is this? 
It’s often said that a little gossip helps the world go round. Whether at home, work or within the family; talking about other people seems to be one of our favourite pastimes. And it’s not just about people we know – or know of – but also those in the public eye, even though we’ve never met them and are unlikely to do so. 
 
Regardless of who we’re talking about, there seems to be something irresistible about unearthing another person’s secrets. Even better, if we’re the first one to do so and pass them on, particularly if they’re less than positive. If not downright malicious, perhaps, driven by the green eyed monster… 
 
Increasingly, it’s fuelled by social media which, sadly, encourages knee jerk reactions. The repeating of information without stopping for a moment to consider its accuracy, let alone the ramifications for the person concerned. Or ourselves. And aided in no small part by our old friend, peer pressure. More about this in a moment. 
 
So, why do we gossip and can it really be a positive thing as some Psychologists suggest? 
With all the madness ratchetting up yet again, whether it’s “Pandemic the sequel” or the ongoing saga of the American election – and that’s all we’re going to say on either of those contentious topics (!) – it’s all too easy to be swept away by it all. Finding ourselves trapped in a quagmire of “doom, gloom and despondency” before even realising what’s happening. 
 
So, it seemed like a good time for a quick reminder that how we feel is a choice that each one of us makes, every moment of every day. And, just in case you missed it, we’re going to repeat the most important word in that last sentence. CHOICE. Yes, it is! 
Once again, we have a number of very similar conversations with Clients to thank for the inspiration for this week’s blog post. And, as so often is the case, this is all that’s needed for us to take the hint and put pen to paper. Or, more accurately, fingers to keyboard! 
 
While it may be stating the blindingly obvious – well, to us at least (!) – as the title to this week’s post says, the recipe for each child – and person – is different. Put another way, there’s never been anyone quite like us before and never will be again; which is quite an awe inspiring thought! 
 
And we’re not just talking about physical appearances, which are really only the tip of the iceberg. Rather, ALL the things that make each one of us UNIQUE. 
There are some words which give us away without us ever realising it. We’ve talked about some of them before. Hope. Believe. Try. And many more besides. 
 
They’re all words where we think we’re saying one thing, but the meaning – and intention underpinning them – is very different. It means we’re sending out mixed messages – both to ourselves and those around us – without ever realising it. Even worse, they’re words we use many times a day, usually without giving them a second thought. 
 
The words we’d like to focus on today are often referred to as “good intention” words which, to us, describes them very well. Although, ironically, they usually reflect what someone else thinks – or intends – we should do, rather than us! 
With everyone still being swept away by the ongoing madness at the moment – “Pandemic the sequel” aka “the new abnormal” – this week we felt it was time for something completely different. 
 
So, we’re going to follow on from last week’s beautiful poem by John Keats, with another one that perfectly sums up the qualities needed to ride the very strange times we’re living in. It may have been written over a hundred years ago but is still as true today as it was then. Here it is: 
Having looked at the ongoing madness from several different angles in the last few blog posts, we had planned to write about something completely different this week. However, with the hysteria in the mainstream media ratchetting up yet again, it seems we’ve been overtaken by circumstances! 
 
For some reason, whenever there’s any kind of “problem” – big or small – many people seem to expect someone to rush in and sort it out for them. Someone in “authority” of some sort. The Government – a popular one (!) – the Police, Scientists, Doctors, etc, etc. If we ignore the religious overtones, someone – anyone other than themselves – to dive in and save them. 
 
However, giving away our power to others to make decisions on our behalf, is fraught with danger. Not least because it’s based on a number of assumptions which may not necessarily be true... 
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